I think today’s sermon needs a warning at the beginning, because I’ll be talking about men who use their power to get their way with women, even when women do not consent to such action. I’ll be talking about this in the most sensitive, hope-filled way I can, but if you feel the need to step out, please feel free to do so.
This sermon is inspired by my experience at Chi-Rho camp a few weeks ago; this was at Loch Leven, the camp Bixby Knolls Christian Church owns and operates, along with the other congregations of the Pacific Southwest Region.
I was a counselor that week, one of several male counselors who, among other things, spent each night in the cabin with the 25 or so middle school boys who were present that week.
Each night in the cabin, just before lights out, we gathered all those middle school boys together, and I told them the story of ancient Israel’s greatest king, King David.
On Sunday night, I told them about how David was initially overlooked when Samuel went to choose a new king from among sons of Jesse, and I asked those middle school boys if they had ever felt overlooked or undervalued.
On Monday night, I told them the story of David and Goliath; I told them how Saul tried to get David to at least look like one of his warriors by wearing Saul’s armor, but after trying it on, David said “I can’t wear these - I can’t even walk in all this.” And he went out to face Goliath just as he was, without the armor. I asked the boys if they had ever felt forced or persuaded to be someone or something other than who they felt God created them to be.
By Thursday night, we were up to the story of David and Bathsheba. Some might think twice about telling the story of David and Bathsheba to a group of middle school boys, but here’s why I felt it was important for these boys to hear this story of lust and adultery and misuse of power.
I felt it was important to tell these middle school campers the story of David and Bathsheba, because as a substitute teacher, I have seen many times teenage boys disrespecting the girls in class.
One time, a high school boy was pulling on a girl’s hair.
Another time, a high school boy walked into the classroom and grabbed a snack away from a girl and started eating it. Apparently he thought that whatever she had, he had a right to take. (Let me say that again: he thought that whatever she had, he had a right to take.)
I felt it was important to tell these middle school campers at Loch Leven the story of David and Bathsheba because, earlier that very day at camp, we witnessed one boy camper persist in trying to get a certain girl camper to agree to go out with him, even though she had already said no. Now, these campers were young, and it was mostly innocent, but very soon they won’t be so young, and a boy who doesn’t take no for an answer will be a much more serious issue.
I felt it was important to tell these middle school campers at Loch Leven the story of David and Bathsheba because every day in the news, we hear about some man who didn’t take no for an answer, or who made sexual advances on a woman without her consent. This is in the news almost every day, and middle school boys are paying close attention to how we respond to such news.
There are many in our society who try to justify or excuse such behavior. They say things like “boys will be boys,” or, “he was just talking - it’s locker room talk, all boys talk like that.” If we stay silent, then that’s the only message these boys will hear, that it’s OK to behave that way…
But according to the Bible, it’s not. According to the Bible, how we treat people is important. According to the Bible, how men treat women is important.
Jesus often surprised his followers by engaging with women in ways that respected their dignity. And in the story of David and Bathsheba, we learn that when men don’t respect women, there are consequences.
The story of David and Bathsheba starts out by mentioning that it was springtime, the time of year when kings go out to battle; except David was home, in Jerusalem. He should have been out in battle. He should have been out leading his army. But he wasn’t.
So with battles raging, David is at home, and he’s walking along the roof of his palace, enjoying the breeze on a warm day, and from the roof of his palace he sees the beautiful Bathsheba, bathing on the roof of a home nearby.
He asks his advisors, “Who is she?”
They respond, “She is Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah.”
Now, Uriah was a good soldier who was off fighting in the war. How convenient. So David has Bathsheba brought to him.
He didn’t ask if she wanted to come... It didn’t matter. He was the king. If the king summons you, you don’t refuse. You don’t say no to the king. The king can take whatever he wants.
The two had sex. It doesn’t seem that she had consented to this sex, so perhaps a better word for it would be rape.
Then David sent her back to her house.
A short time later, she discovered she was pregnant, and she sent word to King David letting him know.
Well, this wasn’t good. King David did have a reputation to uphold. After all, he was Israel’s greatest king.
So he tried to cover it up.
Quickly, he summoned Bathsheba’s husband, Uriah, from the battlefront. David told Uriah, “You’re a good soldier; you deserve a little rest. Go home, relax, spend some time with your wife…”
David’s thinking was that if Uriah did this, then when the baby came, Uriah would assume the baby was his, and no one would ever know that the baby was actually David’s.
Except Bathsheba; but she was just a woman. If she said anything, no one would believe her.
However, Uriah refused to go home. How could he enjoy a little R&R while the battle still raged? He was too loyal a soldier to do that.
Alright. On to plan B.
David had Uriah placed right at the front of the battle lines, where he would be an easy target for the enemy. And sure enough, Uriah was killed in battle.
And after a brief, obligatory period of mourning, David - out of the kindness of his heart - took Bathsheba to be his wife. And, yeah, it wouldn’t be quite nine months before the baby was born, but if the king says, “hey, that baby was just born early...,” who would argue with the king?
Everything worked out perfectly for King David. He was able to pull all this off, he got rid of Uriah, he took Bathsheba as his wife, he got a new baby son, and his reputation as Israel’s greatest king remained intact.
Until Nathan came along.
Nathan was a prophet. A truth-teller.
Nathan told David a story about two men. One of the men was very rich and had lots and lots of sheep. The other man was poor, and only had one little ewe lamb.
As the story goes on, the rich man went out and stole that one little poor ewe lamb from the poor man and added it to his own already large flock of sheep.
David apparently thought that this was a true, literal event. David felt bad for the poor man, and furious at the man who stole his sheep. He said “the man who did this deserves to die!”
Then Nathan looked at David and said: “You are that man.”
The blood drained from David’s face. He knew he had been found out. And it wasn’t just that he had been caught. Until now, David hadn’t really thought about what he had done, he only thought about how he could cover it up and maintain his reputation.
But now, suddenly, the severity of his crime dawned on him. He realized, for the first time, that what he had done was wrong. Very wrong!
He confessed his sin to Nathan. He confessed his sin before God. He repented. And God forgave him his sin.
But that doesn’t mean there weren’t consequences. There were - very serious consequences. I don’t have time to tell you about them, but if you want to find out more, I encourage you to read the second book of Samuel.
Despite what David did, and despite the consequences that followed, David is still regarded as the greatest king in Israel’s history. He is the king Israel is most proud of. He is the one person whose name is mentioned more than any other name in the entire Bible, except for Jesus.
But there is a difference between being a great king, and being a perfect king. David was not perfect.
David had flaws. David sinned.
And chief among them was that David used women. David used his power to control women, and force them to do things they didn’t want to do. Maybe he felt that his power and position had given him that right. Maybe he justified it by saying that it was just what powerful men did.
But treating women this way was clearly not acceptable to God, which is why God sent Nathan, the prophet, to confront David.
And because God sent Nathan to David to confront David with his sin, we know that God does care about the way women are treated. God cared about Bathsheba, even when she thought no one cared. Even when her voice was silenced, God heard her cry. So we know that God does hear the cries of all women, even when their cries are muffled by threats of violence; even when their cries are muffled by the strong hands that cover them; even when their cries remain silent for days, weeks, years, God hears.
Because God sent Nathan to David, we know that God is acquainted with the pain and sorrow of women who have been taken advantage of, and that God wants nothing more than to hold them, heal them, comfort them, and wipe their tears.
Because God sent Nathan to David, we know that the dignity of Bathsheba is just as important to God as the dignity of David; that Bathsheba is just as worthy of respect, just as worthy of honor, and just as worthy of being taken seriously….
Because God sent Nathan to David, we know that God does care how the powerful treat those with less power, regardless of gender. Even today, it is usually men who have the power, but that’s not always the case. And we know that God will hold accountable anyone who abuses their power in this or any other way.
Because there is no room in the kingdom of God for coercion, or rape, or the misuse of power. There is no room in the kingdom of God for the mistreatment of any person for any reason.
Boys, as well as girls, need to know this.
They need to know that the kingdom of God is all about mutual love, the kind of love that does no harm to another. The kingdom of God is about loving your neighbor as yourself, loving your neighbor enough to do unto them as you would have them do unto you. The kingdom of God is about supporting and respecting every person.
They need to know that the kingdom of God is about using the power you have for good. The kingdom of God is about using your power to lift up those who are weak, to strengthen and empower others, and not push them down or tear them apart.
And the kingdom of God is about speaking the truth and allowing others to speak their truth, instead of forcing people into silence as a result of their fear.
And the kingdom of God is about healing. It’s where broken people are allowed to pick up the pieces of who they are, and allow God to put them back together again.
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